Got Zoloft?

This weather is making me completely depressed again. I think I've always had a problem with depression, because in high school I'd have these really melodramatic periods where I'd cry for no reason. It was better handled in high school since I actually had to be around people and my parents. The weather was so much better, and I could just handle it a lot better.

Nowadays, every time I walk by a bridge I always think about jumping off the bridge, and just how easily that could be done. Those are some really dark moments, but I always end up thinking that I don't want to die...so then I just tell myself that I'm not depressed.

Last night I had a dream that I had died. I don't think I woke up to be even fazed by it. I didn't think about it twice. It was odd, mostly because in the dream, I died because I fell and cracked my head open.

There's no reason for me to be depressed, and it's true with all those stupidass commercials, because I do feel like I am hurting people around me. The boy isn't exactly getting the best or even the mediocre girl that he could have, and last time I was this depressed, I stopped talking to my parents for about 4 weeks straight and they thought I got kidnapped.

I think I'm just sick of life right now because I don't see a point in it. I have a future, and these next 5-6 weeks are just a complete waste of my time, and I'd rather fall into a drug-induced coma for 6 weeks than deal with 20degree snowfalls every day. I need a vacation from life.

I'm going away this weekend, at least.