alcoholism

you know you are an overworked, stressed out, alcoholic college student when alcohol starts reminding you of people you know.

for example: the three olives vodka reminds me of this heinous bitch i will refer to as CB. Last year, she told us she'd take us to the grocery store to buy some brownie mix so we can make brownies...we waited for 2 hours for her and she never took us. HGF steps up to the plate and goes and buys the brownie mix for us...except that bitch of a person CB gives HGF money to buy HER liquor and not even offering to drive him to the liquor store or to pick him back up.

example 2: tequila is associated with Pradabag because he loves that shit and it keeps him warm because lord knows the heater in his house doesn't.

unfortunately for most of my friends, most alcohol is associated with them.

Jagermeister, for when HGF has to go to the library so he does a jager bomb and walks to the library.

Absolut Ruby Red, for HBF because she drinks that shit like it's juice.

Chopin, for HJF because he complains when the liquor store doesn't have the 1.5L instead of the 750mL of that vodka.

Niagara mist wine, for everyone on wine tour when we drank one bottle of wine per 5 minutes

Sangria, for seeming to be the safest drink, and yet the most lethal because it floors us like no other.